so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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