a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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