And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize