Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat

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  (203): i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat http://tfl.nu/frov
  Replies (24) Good night (4642) Bad night (581)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.

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  (508): VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING. http://tfl.nu/vx02
  Replies (22) Good night (5228) Bad night (790)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."

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  (757): At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP." http://tfl.nu/p091
  Replies (298) Good night (75056) Bad night (2942)
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  (786): View more from Florida

  He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way

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  (786): He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way http://tfl.nu/nq2f
  Replies (26) Good night (5718) Bad night (1616)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.

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  (520): She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes. http://tfl.nu/56a9
  Replies (19) Good night (9047) Bad night (1031)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.

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  (305): i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town. http://tfl.nu/vmwk
  Replies (12) Good night (5607) Bad night (1160)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning

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  (414): I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning http://tfl.nu/2xis
  Replies (12) Good night (2031) Bad night (1202)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.

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  (336): Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom. http://tfl.nu/g9fv
  Replies (2) Good night (1261) Bad night (718)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.

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  (812): Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down. http://tfl.nu/9hkg
  Replies (7) Good night (1045) Bad night (507)
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  (925): View more from California

  You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there

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  (925): You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there http://tfl.nu/g2al
  Replies (3) Good night (959) Bad night (428)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"

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  (606): And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?" http://tfl.nu/s0we
  Replies (4) Good night (570) Bad night (377)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.

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  (865): Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night. http://tfl.nu/r05q
  Replies (2) Good night (611) Bad night (294)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."

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  (973): Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel." http://tfl.nu/he4q
  Replies (2) Good night (736) Bad night (360)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?

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  (612): Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe? http://tfl.nu/94og
  Replies (2) Good night (332) Bad night (415)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up

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  (603): Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up http://tfl.nu/zd9p
  Replies (1) Good night (399) Bad night (192)

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