Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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