in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Randomize
