if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize