You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize