I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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