This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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