Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(732): View more from New Jersey

I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad

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(+31): View more from The Netherlands

He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?

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(661): View more from California

the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero

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(949): View more from California

In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.

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Locals Wish Tourists Would Stop Doing These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(910): View more from North Carolina

Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.

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(940): View more from Texas

He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.

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(734): View more from Michigan

Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over

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(847): View more from Illinois

Enjoy the penises

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