Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.

(1-513): View more from Ohio

trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,

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(714): View more from California

Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.

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(308): View more from Nebraska

What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(206): View more from Washington

Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?

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(402): View more from Nebraska

There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.

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(808): View more from Hawaii

some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.

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(254): View more from Texas

It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.

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