Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
These People Are So Awkward You’ll Get Embarrassed
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
These People Encountered Celebrities in Bizarrely Normal Places
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.