Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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