Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch.
WHAT?!
He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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