I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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