are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Randomize
