I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
