Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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