Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize
