I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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