she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
