why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
