i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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