There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize
