just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
How naked do you want me to be?
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