Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
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You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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