I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Randomize
