I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
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