People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
23 Insane Reasons People Got Fired
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.