Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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