I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize