The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
