Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize