my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
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I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
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C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.