when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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