Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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