i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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