OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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