Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
