so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
