I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
