And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
