TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize
