You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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