Texts From Last Night

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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska

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  (570): cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska http://tfl.nu/incr
  Replies (67) Good night (706) Bad night (3953)
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  (571): View more from Virginia

  I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet

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  (571): I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet http://tfl.nu/qd88
  Replies (25) Good night (4003) Bad night (582)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.

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  (508): Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor. (339): No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though. http://tfl.nu/0uyr
  Replies (34) Good night (9685) Bad night (1366)
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  (845): View more from New York

  i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.

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  (845): i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it. http://tfl.nu/ii10
  Replies (23) Good night (4823) Bad night (853)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.

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  (907): started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night. http://tfl.nu/6i6d
  Replies (20) Good night (1097) Bad night (4972)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense

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  (207): My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense http://tfl.nu/p3xl
  Replies (11) Good night (6254) Bad night (952)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back

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  (503): well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back http://tfl.nu/ecfc
  Replies (5) Good night (3057) Bad night (1440)
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  (516): View more from New York

  This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.

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  (516): This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me. http://tfl.nu/6e09
  Replies (8) Good night (2909) Bad night (726)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below

  (773): View more from Illinois

  When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"

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  (773): We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below (773): When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!" http://tfl.nu/bs1p
  Replies (4) Good night (1785) Bad night (505)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.

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  (919): Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side. http://tfl.nu/vqy8
  Replies (6) Good night (2825) Bad night (519)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.

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  (478): this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this. http://tfl.nu/syfp
  Replies (8) Good night (1264) Bad night (818)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.

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  (206): Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys. http://tfl.nu/t4sn
  Replies (6) Good night (1045) Bad night (411)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror

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  (865): He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror http://tfl.nu/h00k
  Replies (4) Good night (244) Bad night (556)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!

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  (404): It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff! http://tfl.nu/0n5x
  Replies (5) Good night (761) Bad night (290)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?

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  (314): He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left. (1-314): So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home? http://tfl.nu/r5sj
  Replies (5) Good night (653) Bad night (199)

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