I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
