I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
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