Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize