i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I got her a Nickelback box set.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize
