i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize