I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
